“Mister Steele, I have to ask you a very personal question. Would that be all right?” she said. I shrugged and nodded. She already knew I was a con, how bad could the question be.“Mister Steele did you have sex with other inmates when you were incarcerated?” she said. I gave her my strongest it’s none of your business glares. But, in point of fact it was her business.“Yes, but not willingly,” I said.“Often?” she said. I nodded. For the briefest of moments she looked down.“Mister Steele, you are HIV positive,” she said.“What? Huh?” I said. “I can’t be. I was tested when I got out, and I was clean!”“Sometimes the virus can lay dormant for as many as ten years even longer.”I had to think. It could have been Lily, the tattooed lady. It could have been Henrietta, she had been a prostie. But in Henrietta’s case I was pretty sure she was not the one. She’d tested while we were going together and I had her med records. And, add to that, she swore that no man had ever had her without. Intellectually I knew that what I was doing was what was best for the family, but somewhere in a compartment in the back of my brain there was a voice that kept whispering, "You are a failure Harold, you can't do a man's basic job - taking care of your family."And it wasn't just friends and acquaintances who were looking down at me; men I didn't even know looked at me the same way. At Dani's company Christmas party I could see the condescension in the men's eyes as I was introduced. I could see the, "And just what kind of a man are you" written on their faces.But the bottom line was what had to be done had to be done and so I sucked it up and got with the program.A year went by and then I began to get a taste of what the stay at home wife goes through when she has a husband with a high level job that involves travel, late nights, client dinners and the like. Dani would be having dinner and drinks and talking business with some client, usually a man, while I was busy changing diapers..
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